Saturday, May 23, 2015

It's not a sin. It's a crime.

Hey Christians. Here's the deal.

I was going to keep quiet. I wanted to keep quiet. I was going to let this one just slide by, and let all the other news sites, bloggers, media junkies, and joe shmoes write about it.

But the thing is. I can't.

Because I keep reading about it. And because one thing keeps popping up, and I've got to tell you. It's driving me crazy.

When an act not only defies God's laws, but man's laws -- it is not a sin problem. It is a crime.

When an act strips children who have no voice of their innocence, it is not a matter of getting someone's heart right before God. It's about true rehabilitation. 

When a parent knowingly allows innocent children to be alone with a sex offender, it is not a "hard decision." It is straight irresponsibility.

I may not be a total Duggar lover, but I'm a supporter of them as fellow Christians. And I'm not trying to make light of what they had to deal with. I can only imagine how hard it was to hear that their son was up to that. And I can only imagine the pain they are feeling now.

But as Christians, please understand that we can love them, we can support them, and we can forgive them -- but making EXCUSES for any of their behavior is absolutely unacceptable.

Please know that when we say "God has forgiven" and "who are we to care what was done 15 years ago?" and "he was only a child" or "they did their best" . . . that to the rest of the world, we look like spiritual pansies.

And worse, we look like enablers.

So let's stop talking about his "sin." Let's stop petitioning to get their show back on. Let their family deal with the consequences of their actions (and in-actions as it may be.) Pray for them -- but for the love of all things holy, please pray the most for the victims.

Because the WAY we respond as Christians matters.

Let's love. But let's also stand for accountability.

For a more in-depth explanation of my position on this, here's my next post: How I really feel about the Duggars -- and why. 


  1. Yes!! Thank you! God's forgiveness does not free us from the consequences of our actions. He committed a crime and they covered it up and that is not okay.

  2. I agree with you 100%. I'm so sick of Christian groups classifying all sexual actions outside of a husband and wife's relations as equivalent, with the same consequences and expectations for dealing with them. There's no comparison between two consenting teens doing more than they were raised to believe is appropriate and one teen violating another's body without her consent. That's why one is legal and one is not. Makes me so mad.

  3. YES!! And constantly saying he was child, like that excuses it. He knew better, and those girls were hurt, the idea that how old they were should somehow make it less damaging, less of a nightmare... I mean, if I'm attacked as a grown woman, will it be less damaging if my attacker is my age? Younger? And regardless of what type of counseling they've all had, they will need more. It comes back at you in waves. I'm all too familiar with this exact scenario, from abusive older brothers to inept (clueless? enabling? deeply in denial?) parents to church leaders failing to law enforcement dropping the ball. I wish I was shocked, but I'm just heartbroken for those girls.

  4. Thank you for this! It's so true. It's not about hate or wanting to destroy the family--it's about people being held responsible for a crime. I'm absolutely in agreement with Emilie's comment. It's not two teenagers fooling around--it's an older brother touching his younger sister inappropriately. Two very, very different things. And knowing a little about how the Duggars handle sex ed and the like, I hope with all my heart that those girls were never made to feel responsible for what happened. I hope that they were able to get help, but something tells me that they probably didn't. That is the biggest tragedy in this. Not that their skeletons came out, that Josh lost his job, that the family lost their show. No. The biggest tragedy is how his sisters have been treated.
    It makes me so angry that even their parents haven't said anything about them. It's been all about Josh and rallying around him. In his own words, he realized that he would ruin his life. Never mind his sisters. That's the worst part for me.

  5. Be cautious with your stones. When the enemy creeps into your own homes and you are faced with the realities of this world we live in, your bold opinions that flow so easily now will be silenced with overwhelming humility and a yearning for Jehovah-M'Kaddesh to bring peace and healing in the midst of all the accusing Samaritans for each one involved - victims, offenders and loved ones alike. Are there really so many who can boast on the proper reaction? Judgement carries a dangerous sentence.

    1. We'll have to agree to disagree on this one.

  6. So I am curious; what do you think justice should look like?

  7. (Oh and for the record I have never seen a Duggar episode and certainly don't care if their show gets canceled, I am just genuinely curious what you think the proper response by Christians/society/the law should be.)